Are you looking to spice up your sex life?
If your relationship has been feeling a little bland lately, it might be beneficial to switch up your bedroom routine.
For long-term couples, it’s only natural for sexual play to minimize as time goes on. As couples spend more time together and grow older, creativity in the bedroom may become less common.
Fortunately, spicing up your bedroom routine doesn’t have to be time-consuming or embarrassing.
Check out these 8 simple ways to spice up the bedroom fast. With these tips, you can look forward to reigniting the spark once again!
1. Share Your Innermost Desires
One of the most important elements in maintaining a healthy sex life is being vocal about your desires.
As couples grow together, their desires continue to change. With these changes, it’s important to be upfront with your partner about what your current desires are.
Consider that if one partner is bored, it’s likely the other partner is feeling that same way. To counteract this, continue to share your sexual desires with your partner.
Remember, not all sexual desires need to be made into a reality at that time. Some couples prefer to keep certain desires for fantasy and to look forward to in the future.
Having these non-practiced desires helps to keep the passion alive and save opportunities for the future. A common example of this type of desire is anything from group sex to mutually using an escort service.
2. Send a Spontaneous Message
In the age of instant messaging and email, why not send your partner a flirtatious message or photo?
This message can insinuate a desire, a sexual plan for that evening or even describe a recent dream of fantasy. Couples can even describe a recent sexual experience that they shared or what they are currently wearing.
This is a great way for partners to keep one another on their mind when they otherwise cannot be together.
3. Introduce Role Playing
Role-playing is one of the best ways for long-term couples to revamp their sex lives.
After all, for a couple that has been monogamous for so long, it’s common to have fantasies that fall outside of your relationship. To help shine a light on these fantasies, consider introducing role-playing into your bedroom routine.
This can be anything from practicing different names and personalities to creating fictional scenarios.
This role-playing can even fall outside of the bedroom. Therapists often recommend dressing up, meeting at a location independently and arranging a “one night stand.”
During the one night stand, each partner acts as though they are strangers. This can allow the couple to experiment with sexual elements they otherwise do not practice.
4. Don’t be Afraid to Use Erotica
Watching online erotica is continuing to grow in popularity amongst both women and men. In fact, 1 in 3 online erotica website visitors are women and 70% of men admit to watching porn regularly.
Considering such a high percentage of men and women nowadays partake in online erotica, why not try watching together?
When watching erotica together, it’s important to find something that appeals to both. Decide together which videos appeal to you as a couple and which videos are best watched individually. This can be a great way to get both individuals “in the mood” and even provide some ideas for role-playing and new positions.
If watching erotica on screen feels too intimidating, why not try reading erotic stories? These stories are widely available online and are a simple way to ease into eventually watching on-screen erotica.
Not sure where to start? Check out the 10 best porn movies for a general sense of movies that appeal to both men and women alike.
5. Buy a Sex Toy Together
Introducing a sex toy to a long-term relationship is sure to introduce a whole new spark in the relationship.
The key to finding the perfect sex toy is to shop for the toy together. This ensures that both parties are comfortable and excited about the toy and that it’s not solely for the benefit of one partner.
Nowadays, sex toys are so widely available online. This helps make the process of shopping for the toy more anonymous and less humiliating.
Click here for some of the best sex toys available to men and women!
6. Create a Sexual Bucket List
Sometimes it can feel intimidating discussing sexual fantasies with a partner. After all, a fantasy is often a fantasy because it includes something that is considered to be unusual or falling outside of the realm of “normal” sex.
With both partners being vulnerable in their desires, it can help reduce the element of humiliation. Try making a game out of it. Each partner takes a turn writing down different ideas topping their sexual bucket list.
This is also a great way to find some ideas that both parties have in common.
In the end, randomly select a few ideas to try in the next little while.
7. Mutual Masturbation
One of the most common reasons couples report not having sex is being too tired and a lack of time.
The truth is, sometimes the act of sex can feel a little daunting. Couples often feel too tired to engage in the act and that’s where individual masturbation often trumps mutual sex.
Instead, why not try engaging in mutual masturbation? This turns an individual act into a mutual act and provides a whole new means of sexual relations between partners.
Oftentimes, this is faster and more convenient than other forms of sex.
8. Seek Help from a Sex Therapist
If you feel that you have tried everything, consider visiting a sex therapist.
A sex therapist will discuss intimacy issues and assign both parties homework. Sometimes having sex specifically assigned to partners is exactly what a couple needs to ignite that flame.
A therapist will also encourage the couple to try specific new things that work for them and make each party feel more comfortable with these new ideas.
The Best Ways to Spice Up The Bedroom
Spicing up your bedroom routine can feel a little intimidating.
After all, sometimes adding a little creativity into your sex life can feel a touch uncomfortable and even embarrassing. This is especially the case for long-term couples whose sex lives have operated in a certain way for the majority of the relationship.
Instead, have an honest and upfront conversation together about the different ways to spice up the bedroom.
From the introduction of role-playing to creating a sexual bucket list, these simple tricks can be fun and revamp your usual routine. For more articles on sex and relationships, be sure to visit our website!
Remember, boring sex doesn’t have to be a natural aspect of a long-term relationship! Healthy sex is sex that is everchanging, mutual and always exciting.
